"The Savings Account"

By R.M. Walters

They were a good looking couple in their early fifties. They wanted to convert our neighborhood to their religion. Each week, they would bring their pamphlets, knock on every door, and visit with whoever would take the time to listen. Some of their favorite topics were: Are You Saved?  Are you Preparing Yourself for Heaven?  Don't let your ways carry you to Damnation!  Come with us and be saved!  Most of us got to know them as Ed and Marge. We liked them.

One week a new neighbor moved in. The evening Ed and Marge visited him, he was stripped to the waist and sitting on his front steps. He was smoking a cigar and nipping at a bottle of beer. They lit in to him good. He laughed and told them to take their pamphlets elsewhere.

It must have been terribly upsetting for them. You could hardly tell whether they were angry, hurt, or worried about the sinner on the porch. Ed drove away with an unusual squeal of tires. He plowed straight into another car at the corner. Marge was thrown through the windshield. Ed was crushed behind the steering wheel. They died a hell of a death.